How Much Is Too Much?

How do you know when to call it quits? I'm considering it with a few work friends. Seems silly in light of the fact that I'll be leaving in less than six months (five and counting!). Maybe I should just forgive and forget, but that's not really my style. When confronted with someone acting like a jerk, I rarely just let it go. I'm assertive, confident*, and some would say that I'm a b*tch. My friend Sarah says I have moxie. I prefer that description, obviously....but I digress. I don't usually just stand by and let myself be insulted. But now that I have been, and now that I've let it go once, is it fair for me to hold it against the person? Did I miss my chance to stand up for myself? Or is it actually never too late to stand up for what you think is right?




*See previous post

Insecurity

I'm a confident person. Or at least that's what everyone thinks. In my mind, I don't know. I feel like I giant glob of insecurity. Am I good enough for law school? Am I funny enough to hold my own with this group of people? Is someone going to be offended by the joke I'm about to make? Exactly how much can I get away with saying to my boss when he's drunk? All of these things go through my mind in the space of time that it takes to knock back a confidence-inducing gulp of sweet, sweet Jagermeister.

Is confidence really all about perception? Is anyone ever as confident as they seem? Is everyone just employing the fake-it-til-you-make-it strategy? And has anyone ever made it?

Am I the only one that thinks like this? Does any of this cross anyone else's mind, or do I just need to drink more to drown out the little voices in my head?

Sneaky Little Fruit

Oranges are a very deceptive fruit. In fact, I think they are the only deceptive fruit. Case in point: this morning, I grabbed what I would consider to be a fairly large orange from the refrigerator on my way to work. By fairly large, I would estimate it to be about 3.5-4 inches in diameter. Yummy...what a great breakfast! Not so fast, my friends. Once I discarded the vitamin-laden peel, I was left with a small, some might say, puny orange that was little bigger than a nectarine. Why, I ask? Why, dear purveyor of Vitamin C? Why must you torment your faithful followers? Behold the apple. Or the banana. Or the peach. There is nothing deceptive about these fruits. What you see is what you get. I wish the orange would take a cue from these honest and tasty fruits.

Anticipation...

Soo...law school applications are complete, and have been for the past week. And I am on the edge of my desk chair, just waiting to hear something back. I anxiously check my email every couple of hours, even though I'm pretty sure my acceptance (or rejection) will be mailed. You would think that I wouldn't have much time to think about it since school started again and I am currently working between ten and fourteen hours a day...but somehow my brain just keeps going back to it. Talk about torture.

In the Middle of the Night

It's the middle of the night, and I can't sleep. I had homework to do tonight, so I grabbed a cup of coffee on my way home. I got all my homework done about two hours ago, and I'm still wide awake. I decided that while I watch Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay, it would be the perfect time to finish up a project that has been a year in the making. In late 2007, I was inspired by the incomparable Sandra Thames to create a log of all the books I read for a year. I started this at the beginning of January, 2008 and finished up in December. I plan on doing the same this year, and I highly recommend the practice. I loved looking back on what I read last year, and what I thought of each book. For your convenience, I've given each of the books a rating of One through Five stars. One meaning, don't waste your time; and Five, you should own this book already. Without further adieu, I bring you my...

Book Log--2008

1. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini Five Stars
2. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho Three Stars
3. Atonement by Ian McKewan Four Stars
4. On Writing by Stephen King Four Stars
5. No Angel by Penny Vencenzi Three Stars
6. Pretending You care: The Retail Worker’s Handbook by Norman Feuti Two Stars
7. Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen Four Stars
8. Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez One Star
9. Twilight by Stephanie Meyer Five Stars
10. I Was Told There’d Be Cake by Sloane Crosley Four Stars
11. The Debutante Divorcee by Plum Sykes Two Stars
12. The Complete Worst Case Scenario Survival Handbook by Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht Three Stars
13. New Moon by Stephanie Meyer Five Stars
14. Eclipse by Stephanie Meyer Five Stars
15. M. Butterfly by David Henry Hwang Three Stars
16. A Streetcar Named Desire by Tennessee Williams Three Stars
17. The Skin of Our Teeth by Thornton Wilder Two Stars
18. 4 Plays By Eugene O’Neill Three Stars
19. Nights in Rodanthe by Nicholas Sparks Four Stars
20. Murder in Retrospect by Agatha Christie Five Stars
21. Lost & Found by Jacqueline Sheehan Three Stars
22. Irish Rebel by Norah Roberts Two Stars
23. The 13½ Lives of Captain Bluebear by Walter Moers Three Stars
24. Something Dangerous by Penny Vincenzi Four Stars
25. Breaking Dawn by Stephanie Meyers Five Stars
26. Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson Five Stars
27. Names My Sisters Call Me by Megan Crane Three Stars
28. The Monkey Wrench Gang by Edward Abbey Three Stars
29. The Sorrows of Young Werther by Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe Two Stars
30. Ecotopia Emerging by Ernest Callenbach Negative Five Stars
31. Frankenstein by Mary Shelley Two Stars
32. Zodiac by Neal Stephenson Five Stars
33. Ishmael by Daniel Quinn Two Stars
34. Woman on the Edge of Time by Marge Piercy One Star
35. The Fifth Sacred Thing by Starhawk Three Stars
36. Forty Signs of Rain by Kim Stanley Robinson Four Stars
37. The Hunchback of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo Four Stars
38. The Tales of Beedle the Bard by JK Rowling Three Stars

Happy New Year!

Happy 2009!

I had the best New Years Eve ever last night--it just doesn't get any better than hanging out with your best friends and getting a little crazy.

I'm not sure I'll be quite so conventional as to say I'm looking forward to the year ahead, but it should be a big year. I've got a lot going on this year, and if I can successfully make it through, it should be fun!